Boys and girls on the playground, or in any social scene, can be quite a show. The boys push the girls as a form of endearment and use their physical strength to show others their wants and needs. Then we have the girls who are trying to use their words to express themselves as their emotions run high, and tears stream down their faces. Common sense tells us that these are simple differences between boys and girls. But what we don’t realize, is that these differences are actually a result of a difference in how our brains are wired.
The truth is as simple as this, boys and girls are born with different brains, and “…their brains are what drive their impulses, values, and their reality” P.12 (The Female Brain) The male and the female brain are different by nature. We all know men are from Mars and women are from Venus, but the excitement here lies in the notion that these differences are now proven by fact; therefore, shedding a small speck of clarity on the playground scene.
A great example is given by Louann Brizendine, M.D., the author of The Female Brain, when she explains that there are actual scientific reasons why women are naturally better at communicating than men. At birth, well even before birth, a brain is developed by two things: genes and sex hormones.
“A huge testosterone surge beginning in the eighth week will turn this unisex brain male by killing off some cells in the communication centers and growing more cells in the sex and aggression centers. If the testosterone surge doesn’t happen, the female brain continues to grow unperturbed. The fetal girls brain cells sprout more communication centers and areas that process emotion.” P.14
So, in a young girls first few years at life, she is wired to be better at using her words, expressing her emotions and recognizing social cues in those around her, than a boy is.
As women, and for any man who loves a woman, it is important to learn and understand these facts about the female genetic makeup. Then, instead of allowing ourselves to be criticized for being overly emotional or dramatic, we can accept, and help others recognize, that our brain centers for emotion and communication are simply working harder than those same centers in the male brain.
Helping our daughters understand that this is the way the female was made is what’s most important. This way when they are going through their continuous meltdowns, and teenage blowouts caused by puberty, you can help give them tactics and tools on how to cope with this rollercoaster of emotions.
If these ideas interest you, I highly recommend reading The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, M.D. She is also the author of the recently released The Male Brain.
